Note:
The following story is a FICTIONAL account. You may have heard of The Onion. Now
take a look at what we find when we take the newspaper out from under The
Birdhouse and see what's been piling up.
Upset with local
legislators and their inability to close the deal, the Cardinals ownership has
decided to ditch their Ballpark
Village plans. After hitting
a roadblock in Jefferson
City this past week,
William DeWitt Jr. and company took their latest proposals off the
table.
St. Louis Mayor Francis Slay stated, "This is a huge disappointment for the City of
St.
Louis. We were so close to getting approval,
breaking ground, and igniting an economic boom downtown."
Gene
LeShay, a spokesperson for the Redbird front office, rebutted, "We were closer
to setting a record low temperature in St.
Louis
last week than we were at finalizing a deal in
Jeff
City.
It's over for now."
Clearly
the two sides are at their wits end with state lawmakers.
The
Cardinals, though, have not ruled out long-term plans for a
Ballpark
Village,
but DeWitt said in a huff, "We just can't waste that space anymore. We'll go back to the drawing board and
start accepting proposals on a smaller, more affordable scale. But in the
meantime, we have a temporary plan to use the space."
The
Cardinals are going to use approximately $3.2 million of their own cash for
their temporary plan. Chump change compared to the estimated $387 million in the
latest proposal to hit the fan.
Just
what will that temporary plan entail?
LeShay
says, "A little league ball field designed as a replica Busch Stadium and
private park will be built in the space currently designated for the
Ballpark
Village.
It's a simple plan, but it will provide fans with a place enjoy time with family
and friends."
The
Birdhouse was one of the few media outlets provided an advanced copy of the
plan.
The
little league replica Busch Stadium will have home plate situated in the very
southeast corner (Clark & Broadway) of the space pointing outward in the
opposite direction of the real Busch Stadium. The dimensions of the field of
play will be 220 feet down the lines and 245 to center field. Bleachers will be
installed along the baselines holding a capacity 600 fans giving that intimate
little league feel. A lawn area will also be situated in the outfield beyond the
fences where fans will be able to picnic and catch those memorable home run
balls. Lighting will also be installed to allow for night
baseball.
The
park will be called "Fernando
Tatis Field" in honor of the St. Louis Cardinal who set a record no one will
likely ever break: hitting two grand slams in the same inning against the same
pitcher.
About
naming the field after the unlikely Cardinal, LeShay said, "We just felt that
Fernando and his magical feat represent everything good about our little field
of dreams."
To commemorate the
field and the Tatis' record, a statue of Tatis will be placed on the exterior
sidewalk to the park complete with a video screen showing highlights from those
two fateful at-bats. LeShay went on to say, "It's the least we could do
considering the game wasn't even televised in the
St.
Louis area that memorable
night."
The
Cardinals also plan to install a pond in the space to the west of the property
(near Eighth
St.),
where a large hole full of standing water has loomed for the past two years. The
pond will be fully stocked to allow for plenty of fishing along its bank. Though
too small to officially qualify as a lake, it will be named "Tony La Russa
Lake." LeShay said, "Tony has just brought so much peace and comfort to everyone
around him both in this organization and out; we just couldn't imagine naming a
place this most tranquil place after anyone else associated with the
Cardinals."
The
area around the pond will connect to the lawn section in the outfield and will
be filled in with grass, walking paths, benches, trees, and a plush
garden.
Fencing
will surround the entire facility, and admission will be just a few dollars a
person. It will be open from sunrise to sunset, weather permitting, and at night
upon special reservation. On evenings when the big boys are playing across the
street, the park will also be open and its lights illuminated. The replica ball field will be available
to be rented for parties as well as reserved for little league baseball games
and tournaments.
When
asked for the city's opinion regarding the plans and if they will be approved,
Mayor Slay said, "We're disappointed the Cardinals didn't want to keep pushing
forward when we were so close to finalizing the deal, but we'll take what we can
get."
"Plans
for the park sound wonderful. This will be a fabulous way to use the space,
generate some local commerce, and provide a family friendly activity area
downtown while we continue to work towards a long-term
solution."
The
entire facility, which will be known as "The Shadow of Busch Stadium", is
schedule to break ground this November and open its gates for business on
Opening Day 2008.
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